Benno's Figures Forum

Posted by **vellek** on 02 Feb 2012, 18:48

For you American Football fans:

Tom Brady, after living a full life, died. When he got to heaven, God was showing him around. They came to a modest little house with a faded New England Patriots flag in the window. "This house is yours for eternity, Tom," said God. "This is very special; not everyone gets a house up here." Tom felt special, indeed, and walked up to his house. On his way up to the porch he noticed another house just around the corner. It was a 3-story mansion with a Blue and Red sidewalk, a 50-foot tall flagpole waving an enormous New York Giants logo flag; and in every window, a Giants towel.
Tom looked at God and said, "God, I'm not trying to be ungrateful, but I have a question. I was an all-pro QB, I hold many NFL records, and I even won a few Super Bowls."
God said, "So what's your point, Tom?"
"Well, why does Eli Manning get a better house than me?" Brady sheepishly replied.

God chuckled, and said, "Tom, that's not Eli's house, it's mine."

Posted by **Anwenoit** on 03 Feb 2012, 21:07

Hardcore Lingography - Suffolk Accent...
With compliments to Lowestoft mob.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_0Uxhfv6_fQ

Tomek

Posted by **Bourbaki** on 13 Mar 2012, 14:49

Posted by **Ben Bob** on 04 May 2012, 17:31

Mixed emotions: seeing your mother-in-law drive off a cliff in YOUR Mercedes :cheers:

Posted by **bilsonius** on 13 May 2012, 15:39

I see that the latest PSR review is of "Teutonic Knights from Mars"; sounds like a great movie! :thumbup:

Posted by **Ben Bob** on 19 May 2012, 18:22

bilsonius wrote:I see that the latest PSR review is of "Teutonic Knights from Mars"; sounds like a great movie!

Very good

Posted by **ZachB** on 21 May 2012, 17:29

Peter wrote:Answer of Mom: you naughty boy, nothing more

Answer of wife:

Greetings Peter

You forgot this one for the wife: :whip:

and this one :viking:

Posted by **Susofrick** on 04 Jun 2012, 10:51

Found this one and thought it was pretty funny!

But Sweden wasn't much better! This is what the grown-ups listened too! The music is one thing, but the clothes! :-D

I've heard that "Fantasy costumes" were tax-free, don't if that was the true reason behind the costumes.

For some reason the youtube-thing didn't work. Now it's fixed! Thanks!

Posted by **Paul** on 07 Jun 2012, 09:58

seen in the UK

[/quote]

Posted by **DanV.** on 14 Jun 2012, 20:39

Nice

Posted by **Paul** on 17 Jun 2012, 13:24

Posted by **mickey mouse** on 17 Jun 2012, 13:36

@ paul: you dare a lot mate :shock:

Posted by **Paul** on 17 Jun 2012, 14:35

mickey mouse wrote:@ paul: you dare a lot mate

I Don´t see why...either he gets honour / respect because no-one dare make fun of him or there are jokes made about him and he is demystified...the same way as Iron Sky have done ;-)

Jokes...
Hitler is going through a town and suddenly he gets an urge to eat some spinach.
he sees a sign on a vegetable shop, "Fresh Spinach..1/2 price" so he goes in.
He says to the shop owner " I would like 1/2 a kilo of spinach" to which the shop keeper say´s, "sorry we haven´t any". Hitler says, "yes, but the sign says that you do, I as the great leader and the person who has freed europe demand some spinach!!"
The shop keeper thinks a bit, then shouts over his shoulder, "Martha, bring some spinach for Herr Stalin!"

Hitler and his chauffeur take a drive in the countryside. All of a sudden, boom! They drive over a chicken. Hitler tells the chauffeur, "We have to tell the farmer. Let me do it say the Fuehrer, he´ll understand." After two minutes, Hitler runs back holding his backside -- the farmer had given him a thrashing. The two drive on. Again, boom! They run into a pig. Hitler barks, "You go to the farmer this time!" The chauffeur follows his orders but comes back a half an hour later, falling-down drunk with a basket filled with sausages and presents. Hitler is stunned. "What did you tell the farmer?" And the chauffeur says, "I just said, Heil Hitler, the pig is dead!, and they gave me these gifts.

Hitler and Goering are standing atop the Berlin Television Tower. Hitler says, "I´d like to do something to cheer up the Berliners." Goering: "Then jump."

Posted by **Susofrick** on 18 Jun 2012, 09:55

Agree totally with Paul on this! And laughed a lot too. :lol:

Posted by **mickey mouse** on 18 Jun 2012, 15:54

@ paul, i mean that piece of history is still somewhat sensitive between holland and germany. altough, not for me personal, tough

greets mickey

Posted by **Paul** on 18 Jun 2012, 16:32

mickey mouse wrote:@ paul, i mean that piece of history is still somewhat sensitive between holland and germany. altough, not for me personal, tough

greets mickey

I reckoned that´s what you meant ;-)

. That bit of history is sensitive all over the place but I think as long as no-one is worried about making fun of certain parts of it will de-harm it a bit and take away a bit of the effect used by certain people these days, especially at times like when the football on :-)